


Archanaphobia

by Wolf_007



Category: Bones (TV)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Phobias, Spiders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-15
Updated: 2011-12-15
Packaged: 2017-10-27 09:41:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/294343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolf_007/pseuds/Wolf_007
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Booth, the Squint Squad, and a rubber spider.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Archanaphobia

**Author's Note:**

> Okay this is inspired by a picture I saw, from an e-mail, from a friend's dad. It showed a soldier holding two camel spiders (I'm not sure if that's their actual name) up. Together they were as tall as he was. So, I was thinking since Booth was in the army, he was probably in Iraq at one point, and that's where the spiders live. I realize Booth probably isn't afraid of spiders, but I just had to write it.

"Do you see boxes with the numbers 45656789 – 45656792," Angela Montenegro called to her best friend and her best friend's partner who were lost in a sea of shelves.

Angela and Dr. Temperance Brennan had been forced into the basement of the Jeffersonian to find the boxes of the bones in limbo that Cam, their boss, had assigned them to find. It was at that point that Brennan had enlisted the help of her partner Special Agent Seeley Booth. It hadn't been on purpose, but he'd just happened to come by at the right time.

"I think they're over here," Brennan called from somewhere deep in the maze of shelves.

"The filing system here sucks," Booth yelled from what sounded like the opposite direction. "This is our tax dollars at work. In a multi-million dollar lab they race beetles instead of organizing their basement."

"There is a filing system you just have to know what it is," Dr. Brennan argued.

Angela rolled her eyes and continued to look for the boxes that Cam wanted them to locate. Even though Booth and Brennan could barely hear each other they still choose to bicker.

"There over here," Brennan yelled. Her voice sounded even further away to Angela now than it had a few minutes ago. Angela headed in the direction Brennan's voice was coming from.

Brennan had conveniently pulled the boxes they needed off the shelves.

"There's a box missing, and where is Booth," she asked.

"He's probably lost somewhere out there in the sea of boxes."

"Booth doesn't get lost, or he claims he doesn't."

There was a loud curse, the sound of several boxes crashing, and a couple of gunshots. Angela and Brennan exchanged a look before both setting off in the direction the shots came from. They rounded a corner and saw Booth pressed against a shelf with his gun out and pointed at a spot on the ground.

"What is it," Angela and Brennan asked in unison.

Booth's reaction was unusual. Brennan wasn't really sure what had come over her partner. She had only seen the emotion of fear on his face a couple times, like in the leather shop before he had ordered her out, or when Kent had been about to shoot her. Likewise Angela was also confused. She had only seen fear on Booth's face once, and that was when Brennan had been buried alive. Angela looked to the exact spot exact spot where Booth's gun was pointing. She didn't see anything until it moved. Amazed, she looked from the tiny moving object back to Booth's face.

"It's spider about an inch around," Angela said looking to Brennan.

Angela indicated the size with her fingers. Brennan looked from Angela to Booth who'd backed himself even further against the shelves of boxes. It caused another box to fall to the floor with a thud.

"Um, Booth, are you okay," Angela asked cautiously.

"No, but can one of you just kill it now, please," Booth begged.

Angela and Brennan exchanged another look. Both took note that Booth was growing paler quickly.

"These shoes are new. There's no way I'm killing it with my shoe," Angela snapped.

""I never said it had to be a shoe. I just said to kill it," Booth argued.

"I'm still not going to kill it."

"Well, how about you, Bones? Are you going to kill it," Booth questioned.

"We should capture it and ask Hodgins to identify it, instead of killing it," Brennan teased unable to resist the chance. "Booth, if you want it dead why don't you kill it?"

"I'm sure you like me to leave least amount of damage possible, and besides trying to shoot it didn't work," Booth responded to his partner's question.

"Fine, I'll kill it, on two conditions. One, you let me drive for a month, and two, you give a gun," Brennan grinned expecting him to stop acting up.

Booth groaned, and Brennan looked at him. He didn't look so good. He was white, sweating, his eyes were closed, and his breathing uneven. She had never seen him quite this panicked looking. He was completely freaked out over a spider. Brennan sighed, and squashed the spider.

"It's dead," she told him.

He opened his eyes and flashed her, a grateful smile.

"Thanks, Bones, I owe you one."

"Do you have arachnophobia, Booth," Angela asked.

"No, I just don't like spiders," Booth said defensively.

"Usually phobias begin with a traumatic event in childhood. I can understand why you would be afraid if something happened then," Brennan argued.

"I'm not afraid of spiders. Now drop it," Booth said annoyed.

"Wow. Booth, you're afraid of spiders," Hodgins said from front of the aisle where he was standing. He had come down to investigate the gun shots.

"I'm not afraid of spiders and I said drop it," Booth said.

'Drop what," Zack asked coming up next to Hodgins.

"Booth's unnatural fear of spiders," Angela grinned.

"It's not an unnatural. A lot of people are afraid of spiders, but that doesn't matter because I'm not afraid of spiders," Booth growled even more defensive than before.

"Yeah, than why are you backed up against a wall of shelves," Hodgins pointed out.

"Fine, you guys win. I'm afraid of spiders, but it's not like it's all that pleasant to find a pair of camel spiders in your sleeping bags," Booth growled.

"Wow, I never expected an ex-sniper to be afraid of something like spiders, but if you did find camel spiders I can understand that," Hodgins agreed.

"What are camel spiders," Zack asked. Booth shuddered slightly.

"I said drop it and so, now, never bring it upon again. If any of you do I'll personally shoot you between the eyes," Booth ordered, got up, and left the basement.

"So, Booth's afraid of spiders," Hodgins said.

"I've got an idea,' Angela said smiling slowly. Zack and Brennan exchanged a look not liking the look Angela and Hodgins shared.

Booth walked into his office a few days later.

Cullen nodded to him as Booth passed by the open door to Cullen's office.

Booth sat down in his chair and proceeded to get out the files for the case he was working on currently. Opening the drawer was as far as he got before he jumped back yelling. Booth tripped over his chair and knocked it over. He also fell into his desk which made him yelp. He kept scrambling backwards until he backed into Cullen.

"Agent Booth," Cullen started angrily.

"There-There's so-som-something in my d-desk drawer," he stammered. Cullen just stared at him similar to the look Angela had given him two days ago. The normally cocky agent was standing in doorway trying to catch his breath and rubbing the sore spot where he'd slammed into the desk. Cullen looked into the desk drawer. He reached in pulled out a rubber spider.

"Is this it," he asked holding it up. Cullen watched as a flash of anger ran through Booth's eyes.

"Excuse me, Sir, I need to fix something. And can I have the spider?"

"Yeah, here," a very confused Cullen said handing the rubber spider over.

Booth parked the SUV and slammed the door behind him. He stormed into the lab. The squint squad looked up as he came up onto to the platform where. He pulled his gun out.

"Okay, Angela and whoever was helping her are in so much trouble," he yelled holding up the spider. He was still holding the gun.

"It was Hodgins and Angela's idea," Zack turned on them in a heartbeat not trusting Booth with a gun. Booth glared at them. Cam came onto the platform.

"Is there a reason you are waving gun, Agent Booth, or a reason to having a rubber spider," Cam asked curiously. She hadn't heard the conversation yesterday. She was out of the loop in the knowledge of Booth's phobia.

"Um, no reason," Booth said sliding his gun back into his holster.

Cam didn't question, but just nodded and left. Booth turned back to the squint squad.

"I'm not speaking to any of you," Booth yelled at them.

"You just did," Zack pointed out. Booth glared at him.

"Sorry, Booth," Brennan apologized. "There was an opportunity we couldn't pass it up."

Booth glared still not speaking to them. Then his cell phone rang. After he hung up he turned back to them.

"We've got a case," Booth sighed. "That doesn't mean any of you are off the hook. In fact, Bones, you're buying me dinner," he called over his shoulder leaving her to catch up with him.


End file.
